Quote of the day

“People will believe a big lie sooner than a little one, and if you repeat it frequently enough, people will sooner or later believe it.” 

― Walter C. Langer

Quote of the day

"We're constantly changed by events going on in our lives. Sometimes they're cumulative and chip away at our psyche, like yet another bad day at the office, or another smile from a pretty girl that raises our confidence. But occasionally something happens that alters us in the blink of an eye, and we instantly become a different person, for better or for worse."
from I Just Had to go Back to Di Island by Anthony Bjorklund

Quote of the day

"In Advent, we are made aware that the hours of darkness are lengthening. The days grow shorter. Night seems to consume the world. Perhaps we feel the darkness in our own hearts, our own lives, our own prayer: we look for some sign of God and see nothing. Perhaps we are oppressed by the darkness of the world around us: we notice the poor living without shelter on our streets, we hear the cry of the hungry, we are alerted to wars and rumors of war. We yearn to see the day when Christ will come in all his glory to put an end to darkness of every kind. It has been said that in Advent we live in the night with our faces turned toward the unseen dawn. Hosea reminds us of the central conviction of the Advent spirit: 'as certain as the dawn is his coming.' Let us pray in hope for the rising of the Sun."
- from the Magnificat

On Autumn (part deux)

I wrote my original "On Autumn" just a few weeks over two years ago. You can read it here if you're so inclined.

It's another Autumn, and I still gravely dislike the season. The weather gets colder, which is nice sometimes, but I prefer warmth. I prefer my shorts and t-shirts. Now that I'm the proud owner of a motorcycle, I find riding when it's cold is not as enjoyable as riding when it's warm. The shadows get longer, and the days get shorter. All conspiring to remind me that my life is getting shorter too. There's a whole lot less of it in front of me than there is behind me.

In the original of this post, I wrote that "I'll almost certainly be out of this funk by the time Thanksgiving rolls around". I don't recall if that happened that year, but it certainly didn't happen this year. Thanksgiving has recently come and gone and the funk remains. Maybe it'll be gone by Christmas, but I have my doubts.

I retired last year after giving the last 31+ years of my life to the County of Orange. So far, it's not what I thought. The first few months were great but after more than half a year, I'm questioning my decision. Not much I can do about it other than go out and find another job I guess. Yes, I still work part time for the department but I never know how long that will last. I'm a true "at will" employee and nothing is assured. In addition to the fact that I can only work 960 hours or basically half a year,.

"Sounds great!" I hear you saying. Yeah, I guess it does. And it would be great if I had something else to do. You see, I spent the last 31 years doing one thing. I spent the last 21 of those years adding the role of father. Now I have neither. No identity.

Yes, of course I'm still a father. And yes, she still lives at home and needs me. But it's not the same. She has her own likes, friends, and plans. All too soon, I'm sure she will find her own "life" that will include less and less of me. That's fine. I get it. That's the way it's supposed to be. The "Circle of Life" as it were. But where does that leave me? I haven't had a wife for 20 years. No one to share the good times and bad, the daily ins and outs of life. If I did, this retirement thing might be better. Someone to share it with. Again, I hear you married guys in unison shouting "you're alone...you can do whatever you want...that's awesome."

It's not awesome. I wrote about that in the original post too. Again here's the link if you didn't read it before.

Quote of the day

"One of the reasons we made it to the top of the food chain, besides being able to manufacture weapons of mass destruction, is our adaptability. You can put one of us in any situation, no matter how extreme, and we'll usually find a way to cope. And that's a good thing. But sometimes we adapt in a way that isn't all that healthy, like staying in a harmful relationship. Or job. Or boring ass life. If we don't break out by a certain point there's a chance we'll never do so, and we simply accept it. We've adapted to our circumstances, when we should be gnawing our leg off to escape like any decent wild animal would. But we humans are civilized and tend to accept whatever crap is thrown our way, no matter how buried in it we become."
~ from I'm Gonna Live My Life Like a Jimmy Buffett Song by Anthony Bjorklund

Quote of the day, part II

"He that shall desert the ship or his quarters in time of battle shall be punished by death or marooning"
~ Pirate Code agreed by Bartholomew Roberts 
as quoted in Jack and Di Rum Song by Anthony Bjorklund

Quote of the day

"Promises made to yourself aren't very useful since you hardly mind when the promisee ends up breaking them, and it's damned hard to even get an apology afterwards."
From Jack and Di Rum Song by Anthony Bjorklund